The Bachelor: I Celebrate Myself

Perhaps Brad Womack is more than we gave him credit for. The down-home bar-owner who looks, and sadly talks, like the offspring of George Bush from some lost weekend back in Texas 35 years ago, did the heretofore unthinkable in teh season finale of cringe fest "The Bachelor" and gave his last rose to...himself.

For a show that I'm sure upsets feminists on a weekly basis (and let's face it, "The Bachelorette" doesn't exactly balance things out), I find it absurdly amusing that the the protagonist of the show, the man who could have had any one of these "eligible" ladies' hearts, rejects the fairytale and chooses to go it alone. How brave of him. How daring. How...feminist?

Before continuing, I will issue the disclaimer that I saw only part of one episode before watching last night's finale (concurrent with "A Shot of Love with Tila Tequila" - it was a big night for me). I lost interest, like most of America, in "The Bachelor" about five years ago. What was once a guilty pleasure now feels just...lame. But I had heard that Womack would be dumping both girls, so I had to see it for myself.

There are rumors that he wanted to date both, and/or that he has a child with another woman with whom he's reuniting. I have no idea, nor do I care. What's noteworthy is that he took these two bachelorettes for a ride, and for the first time, us too. He had the ring all ready; he kept saying how he'd been looking forward to this day his whole life, yadda yadda yadda. There was no reason not to think he would at least ask one of the girls to "see where this can take us".

And after rejecting Jenni, a painfully sweet girl with the emotional maturity - and vocabulary - of a 14-year old, all signs indicated that sassy DeAnna was going to be the one to take that ill-fated ride. But not so fast. In one of the show's more cruel moments, Brad lets DeAnna know that he just sent Jenny home. Pause. Watch DeAnna's eyes light up. Watch her swallow her self-satisfied smile. See Brad sweat. The pause continues...then Brad needs a break. OK, proposal nerves...right? He asks DeAnna for a moment and steps off the pedestal, and in that second, DeAnna goes from being "oh, that poor girl" to "is this how she reacts to her loved one's emotional turmoil"? Maybe it's just me, but if the man I loved seemed to be having a problem, I'd probably say something. Instead, she remains on her mark, adjusts her strapless dress, and waits. Pretty composed for someone about to get engaged? No, that's not it. She's pretty composed for someone who sees magazine covers, a 3-carat sparkler and talk shows in her future.

But Brad returns to squash her barely-formed visions of C-list celebritydom. He let's DeAnna know he loves her, but he's not "in love" with her. Classic. And while she doesn't totally flip out, she doesn't let him off the hook. She claims not to understand, which is funny because isn't that one of the oldest break up lines on record?

So Brad chose himself. He would rather go it alone (if the rumors are not to be believed, including the one that he's gay) than to risk living a lie with one of these two women. He trusted, perhaps misguidedly, that the love he does share with these women would help make his choice palatable.  His words and actions recall Walt Whitman's classic poem, Song of Myself:

I celebrate myself, and sing myself,
And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.

Perhaps Brad Womack is more than he appears. Perhaps he is looking to live a life more meaningful than that of owning bars and dating 28 women at once, and merely settling for one of them. Perhaps... perhaps he will be back as next season's Bachelor.

Click here to watch the final episode in all its painful glory.

Image courtesy ABC

Comments

[Nikki]

THE BACHELOR SPOILERS!
Find out the real reason why Brad rejected all the women...
..
http://www.realitytvspoiler.com