Rocky recast, take two

It seems everyone who isn't bitching about MTV ruining "Rocky Horror" by remaking it has jumped on the recasting couch. Here's my take on your suggestions so far. Thoughts? Comments?

Frank N Furter: Amy Winehouse. Not only is she a freak, but twisting the sexuality around would be hot. And she could tear those songs UP. And it would just add a dimension if she stumbled her way through. Bonus points to commenter Mark, who suggested a quartet of actors to play Frank, all directed by Todd Haynes. Wino, Wentz, Prince, and Marilyn Manson?

Brad: Jake Gyllenhaal. OK, he can't sing, but hey, Rocky's voice was dubbed in the original, and NOBODY does goofy or discovering-his-gay-sexuality better.

Janet: Lindsay Lohan. Dammit, Lindsay, we love you, and we are determined to make "Touch-a Touch-a" hit the Billboard charts this time around. (Should Linds be in rehab during filming, I'd go for Amy Adams ...)

Riff Raff: Neil Patrick Harris. You guys thought he should be Brad, but after "Dr. Horrible," I wanna see him REALLY evil.

Eddie: Jack Black. The role he was born to play.

Magenta: Madonna. Failing Madonna, Gwen Stefani. (Though Defamer's suggestion of Pink is also brill -- see below.) Crazy Juliette Lewis might be genius, too.

Columbia: Jake Shears. He looks the part already, don't you think?

Dr. Everett von Scott: Tim Curry in a cameo! How much do we love Gay.com reader Mark (again!) for suggesting this?

Rocky: A gay porn star of our choosing, you say. But he has to sing: Colton Ford? How about Broadway hottie (and out actor) Cheyenne Jackson?

By the way, since my fellow blogger Carter Todd posted his Pete Wentz suggestion, lots of other blogs have cast him, too. I like Defamer's suggestions the best -- Bruce Vilanch as Rocky? -- but seriously, I think Gay.com's are the best!

Defamer's "Rocky" cast:

Frank N Furter: Seth Green. Excels at every genre; has the drag and dismemberment experience from "Disco Bloodbath."
Brad: Zac Efron. Kind or a no-brainer. Just give him a pair of Buddy Hollys and a silk robe and let him do his thing.
Janet: Miley Cyrus. She can convincingly convey Ms. Weiss's journey from churchgoing virgin to touch-a touch-a touch-a slutbag.
Magenta: Pink. Same colour family—close enough.
Riff Raff: Pete Wentz. Just creepily calculated enough. Will likely be bald in the next few years if he keeps relaxing his hair.
Columbia: Kelly Osbourne. Suitably Betty Boopish.
Eddie: Jack Black. He's our Meatloaf. There is no one else.
Dr. Everett Von Scott: James Lipton. We know he has fishnets on underneath that "Inside the Actor's Studio" desk.
Rocky: Madonna. Bruce Vilanch. Levi Alves McConaughey. Or anyone besides Mario Lopez, who's currently doing gravity-boot crunches and demanding over speaker phone that his agent get him an audition.

Comments

[Wendell]

Not sure that a remake is such a good idea, but if they did:

Frank-n-Furter- Dave Navaro, cuz he's yummy and already has the make-up and fishnets and a bi-sexual vibe.

Riff Raff- Alan Cumming. C'mon, he'd be perfect!!!!

Magenta- Cyndi Lauper would tear this up. How fun would she be, besides a ton? (I would say Amy Winehouse, but she would never make it through an entire shooting schedule)

Columbia- Niki Blonsky. Give a big girl this role and watch her hit it out of the park.

Brad- James Marsden. Again, because he is yummy and was adorable in Hairspray. Love him.

Janet- Amanda Seyfried. I just saw Mamma Mia and she would be great in this too. Good voice for Janet.

Dr. Scott- I can't suggest anything better than James Lipton. That would be hysterical.

Rocky- Colton Ford, Colton Ford, Colton Ford, Colton Ford, Colton Ford. Nuf Said.

[Michael]

I think Amy Winehouse should be Magenta... think about it.... she has almost got the hair down. just needs to be reddish

[Eddie]

I am open as the next guy to role reveresal and taking a actor from another world to play a role that is totaly different then the original. But I totally do not ,ike the idea of going big girl on columbia. Little Nell was red headed and small and a fire cracker. Kelly Osbore as Magenta ok would fly for me. Or Blonski as Magenta. But Columbia just begs for another firecracker. And no red hair is not a requirement. But think people My first suggestion of Kirstin Dunst is great. And if you like i will even go with PINK as columbia for teh shock value. Alan Cummings was a great suggestion for Riff Raff. But i still say after his cameo on the CARTER FAMILIY sitcom/reality show. He had the crack addict and blonde wild man thing going on and he is RIFF RAFF 2009! And he would be a Ying to the Yang of Amy Winehouse as Magenta and Jack Black as EDDIE! Zac Efron as Brad might fly now too. But make him keep his killer tan from HS Musical and he could be a wet dream as Rocky and he can sing! Zac in gold thong and boots. OMG I am leaking as we speak! James Lipton or Tim Curry in a cameo as the great DR Scott would be shear genious! And I still say Linsey as Janet will bring the house down! If she can get back her inner Linsey from Parent Trap days Or even get back to Herbie the Love Bug Linsey. Then Janet will be a golden highlite! She can turn it on and off at will. As we KNOW she can get the later Janet with out breaking a sweat! And as I said in teh first place. The only person that would be shear terror and awesome as Frank! would be Nick Simmons! For shear screen presents at 6'5 or more he is the man for the job. He can sing as well as he has a band. And after all those eyars living with GENE! he can pull off the makeup and not care about his manhood with best of them and dad helping!

[Jim]

I've got a couple of casting suggestions:

Rocky:
Al Santos
Charlie Simpson
Jason Lewis
Vin Diesel

Brad:
George Eads
Hugh Jackman

Also, would love to see Leslie Ann Warren as either Columbia or Magenta, but may be to old for the role. (But she did an amazing job in Victor Victoria). Hmm, maybe Robert Preston as Doctor Scott.

[Bmoe]

I think re-making this cult classic, especially by a well budgeted, pop machine that only cares about commercial value and not the history and traditions involved in the film may be a bigger travesty than the entire Bush administration. The original was made and had accidental pauses built in to allow for call lines. No one can direct those moments into a film sequence. So remaking this would be a sad attempt to make money buy the american commercial machine. I think MTV should go back to its roots and start actually showing music videos .. Just a thought

[David]

OMG! Some of these "actors" being suggested for the remake are plain repulsive! What DRUGS are YOU people on, for God's sakes: Lindsay Lohan? "Miss" Zac Efron (closeted homophobe)? Miley Cyrus? THESE idiots/"pseudo-actors" stink and have NO idea what the legendary "Rocky Horror Picture Show" really is. Yea, I'll see THIS remake when hell freezes over. LMFAO! Actors/Singers suggested who I DO LIKE: Jake Gyllenhall, Neil Patrick Harris, Pete Wentz, Marilyn Manson, Kelly Osborne, Seth Green, Jack Black, Cindy Lauper, Amy Winehouse. THESE actors/singers would fit THIS remake perfectly! They have REAL talent, too (duh). PLEASE, NO LINDS -OR- Miss Efron. YUCK.

[berray]

you must be straight eddie, robert preston has been dead for years...how about larry king for Dr. Scott and lets find a place for john waters!! james lipton would be a hoot also

[Ricardo]

Jake Gyllenhaal has a great voice! Check out his Dreamgirls bit on Youtube from SNL last January.

Also, he was a runner-up for Ewan McGregor's role in Moulin Rouge!

So there!

[misled]

If you are going to remake a classic, then go all out…yeah, Pink & Pete Wentz would make a good Riff Raff & Magenta; but that would be a reactive selection based on their popularity and their downright cuteness factor. I hope that some great underground talents are not overlooked because of their lack of mainstream popularity! The best possible contemporary thespians that would truly “feel” the part of the incestuous brother and sister duo would have to be none other than the Dresden Dolls’ Amanda Palmer & Brian Viglione! Of course Brian would make a great Dr. Frank-n-Furter as well…he has been a cross-dresser since the age of twelve...

[James]

Ugh, Jack Black, what is wrong with you people? Eddie is supposed to represent the 'normal' deviation from what is considered to be the norm. He's a greaser with a force of personality capable of pulling someone like columbia along for a ride, despite his lack of conventional attractiveness. The character is then throuwn into a situation where he is as quaint as those he rebeled against and is washed along wildly in the flow of events until his ultimate downfall. He's not a buffonish talentless moron like jack black. The very idea of that whelp being suggested to fill Meatloafs shoes is just, ugh.

[....LOvEr....]

Hey Fuckers,
you should stop fantasing about who you would love to see in drag or singing these songs because no one will be better than the original cast.
it was made that way and shouldn't be remade.

Have you guys even seen the original?
Do you want to kill an amazing movie or are you just trying to be assholes?
Please tell me because i don't understand your logic.............
LOvE

[Acomplia]

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