Celeb Gay Cards Revoked?

We are so enamored with stars who play gay or even a gay man's best friend, but for how long? Is there an expiration date on our devotion?

Take Debra Messing. A lot of my friends couldn't get enough of her when she was on Will & Grace. But once Will & Grace ended, she fell off our gay radar. It's not that we turned on her. It's just that we lost interest.

Maybe it hurts that she didn't play gay but rather a gay man's best friend.

Then again, her Will & Grace co-star Megan Mullally, who also played a gay man's best friend on the show, has a free pass for life when it comes to gay adoration. At least according to my circle of friends. 

My informal poll also found that Jake Gyllenhall has earned a lifetime of worship thanks to Brokeback Mountain, and Hilary Swank will be forever beloved because of Boys Don't Cry. Queer As Folk god Gale Harold is also in for eternity.

I didn't even have to ask about Barbra Streisand, Elizabeth Taylor, Madonna and Cyndi Lauper. These women have achieved a supreme level of gay adoration and really don't need to do a thing beyond what they've already done to hold onto their special place in our hearts.

But Sean Hayes really needs to do something to win us back because we don't think of him much these days, according to my survey. This is ironic given the fact that he is rumored to actually be one of us, although he doesn't discuss his sexual orientation, and he played a gay man on Will & Grace. Maybe there is some resentment on our part?

Eric McCormack is another one who needs to boost his gay popularity battery, my circle says. Yes, he played gay on Will & Grace, but who really thinks about him these days? Seriously, is Eric on any gay person's list of favorite all-time stars?

And what about Gina Gershon of Bound fame? I know many lesbians will argue with me on this one, but two of my lesbian friends insist that Gina is teetering of the edge of being able to say "I have a big gay following" and really needs to do something to maintain our interest in her.

Meanwhile, Antonio Banderas and Tom Hanks, who won our hearts with their portrayals of gay men in Philadelphia, aren't so much on our radar these days. Any status they achieved in our community thanks to that groundbreaking film seems to have faded over the years.

We are a fickle bunch, aren't we?

So what do you think? Do you agree that stars like Debra Messing have lost their gay following? If so, why, and what can they do to regain it? And who in your mind has achieved a supreme level of gay adoration that will never fade?

(Images courtesy of Getty)

Comments

[Queer4Cher]

Hellllllllo??? Did you forget about the biggest diva of all time in the gay mecca....CHER! She has a lifetime subscription to the gay adoration fan club! :)

[David]

Antonio off the list...AFTER he played PUSS? Oh, PLEASE!!!!

[Joey]

Not really, all those who saw Will&Grace or Brokeback mountain or whatever will always remember those actors for what role they played. Even though they may be fading now, they are still popular in my book.

[djword]

You know what? An actor's job is to act...to make the viewer sympathetic to the part the actor plays...and to make the character they play believable to the audience. Kudos to all of these actors who have touched us with their believable, funny, sad, every day, poignant, humorous. loveable portrayals of all the extraordinary, outrageous, funny, mundane people we know and adore in real life.

[tahiti101]

what about jennifer saunders and joanna lumley? better known as the infamous eddie and patsy.

[Gay Ball Sack]

i think it's like when straight people see other straights acting out as gays in tv or film, they're intrigued or disgusted in some way at the least, even if they're accepting. however, gays saying that once you stop playing gay on tv or film, and didn't make as oscar-winning a dent in our hearts, that you're yesterday's news.

so, is syndicated network television and hollywood films just for gays to coo like a baby over some guy who's most likely straight but too hot to pass up?

if so, please, do ME a favor for YOU, and find a real celebrity look-a-like, and date them or pass them around like a used condom. stir some shit up. if we're just meat and bones, there's no harm no foul, right?

[Mykal Romero]

This story is a sad attempt to put up a bunch of celeb pictures.

[Dustin]

I really think that anyone who has been on the small or big screen in roles should be always thanked by the gay community because lets face it 15 years ago we would not even be talking about this because no one in hollywood was about to take on the roles or put these shows on TV and I think that it's amazing that it is almost a non-issue when taking a role these days.

[Thomas Waters]

This is a fairly silly article. If you want to know why Cyndi Lauper has an on-going gay fan base but Debra Messing doesn't- it isn't about a fickle gay audience. Look at the level of support over a long time! We didn't just give it to her- she earned it, and kept earning it. Jake and Heath are a bit of a different issue. It seems that what they did was so huge- so revolutionary- that the extremeness of it gives them the life-long pass. Add to that, Jake is hot as hell. Because while I don't think gay fickleness plays a role, it is true that we are always a push over for a handsome guy.

Sometimes friendships last forever, and sometimes friendships come and fade in time. What makes the difference? I think the same applies to gay followings for celebs.

[Scott]

Who cares. In the grad scheme of things isn't this kinda petty? Performers would probably be regarded by their talents and not the sexual orientation of a part they "played". I think most people would rather be regarded by themselves as people and the quality of their character. I prefer to be thought of as a good son, brother, uncle, employee and neighbor. My sexual orientation doesn't define me.

[Donald]

It is a silly article but I have to say, I think Debra Messing is wonderful. No she is not Grace anymore but she is still an amazing actress. And so gorgeous to boot. I cant wait for her Starter Wife Series to start again. I think its silly to think that we as gay people are fickle. Doesnt everyone gay or straight just kinda fade outof the picture?

[Me]

Well... until the new ones come along or when they get old and ugly! It's not like they lent me money or did me a personal favor. I remember those that helped me in my time of need forever. Not those that do stuff on TV! AND SO SHOULD EVERYBODY ELSE!

[RadioRiot]

In my 50 years on earth, I have found that any actor that won't discuss their sexual orientation is always, always GAY. Sean, Sean, Sean... Gay, Gay, Gay.

[Savio]

Hey there, I must say Will & Grace is my most fav of all TV shows... don’t get their CDs here so I downloaded all of em and can’t stop viewing them over and over.
I believe that all these actors will always remain the best in our lives. They are the reason we came out, we talked like we wanted and we said what we felt right. They made us feel we are not isolated and that we have their support. Such great actors will always be remembered for all the things we experienced when they came on screen and faded away with new roles... but whatever be their new roles - we surely will be hopping and jumping to see each one of them no matter which role they play.

[Savio]

And Yes, unlike one silly guy who wrote that this was an attempt to add celeb pics - I loved each one of them. Thank you - Gay.com

[Mykal Romero]

You would.

[MarkF]

All you have to do is be a really ugly, mouthy and foul woman to be a "gay" icon... I guess it's because the "gay" crowd can relate to those types.

Are there are masculine, white guys who "gay" men like? "Gay" men secret lust after masculine, white guys, but at the same time demean them. It's weird, but being weird and unnatural is the first step in being a successful homosexual.

[HT]

Seems that way with celebs in general... until they find another way to extend 15 more minutes of fame; which means in this day and age it's by being as raunchy as possible.

As for Sean Hayes, it's his business and he shouldn't have to be wiggled into telling the world who he goes bed with. Either way, he should be respected for genuinely keeping his personal life out of the spot light.

[ME]

It doesn't matter if the actor plays a gay role or gay's best friend in a show or movie once or more, as long as that actor/actress keeps their love and support towards gays/lesbians we will always be their fans and followers.

[Shawn]

If you liked Will & Grace then watch UGLY BETTY, it's gay friendly and very funny...you'll be entertained!

[Zacky_Binx]

For all the stars named on here yes they were and are still fab look at all the honors that they have had and have yet to win and as far as Babs and Cher they can't hold a candle to the ultimate and First Diva. Miss Tina Turner

[Rndmacts]

Funny there are gay Icons that cannot be questionned, Judy, Barbra, Liza, Bette, Cher, Cyndi, Madonna, and Melissa, they just are. You notice that they are all women.

For a man to be a GAY ICON,he has to do something to earn it, Eric McCormick, Brad Pitt, Heath Ledger, Jake Gyllenhall all took stands in support of us, they deserve to be permanent. Of the current crop of Out Gay actors the only three I have any respect for are Neil Patrick Harris, John Barrowman and the actor who plays Soctty on Brothers and Sisters, their haven't let being gay define them. Sean Heyes is a poser, Ellen and Rosie are different sides of the same page, and T.R. Knight, he wasn't remarkable before his outing and he isn't a great thespian now. The likes of George Clooney, Tom Cruise or Tom Hanks were never on my support radar, though Antonio Banderas was playing gay before arriving in North America, so he should have a permanent position, but Tom Hanks as a person doesn't give a shit on support for gays, as long as a part will pay money, ditto for Tom Cruise.

There are a number of people who fight tirelessly on our behalf and deserve our undying respect and gratitude such as Elizabeth Taylor and Judith Light, but they are fighting a disease, which greatly affects us, and I apologize to Judith if I have it wrong, but in Elizabeth's case I know she doesn't care about our rights but only that an insidious disease is robbing her of her friends and fan base, as a gay man she neve drew me to the theatre. Yet Kurt Russell will aways turn me on because I have a book published when he was a Disney Star that shows Kurt in the nude and since then he has stroked my fantasies, but it doesn't make him an Icon, though his wife approaches that exalted state.

[derelictdk]

Wow. Heavy hitting, guys. Thanks for blowing the lid off. Your article packed one hell of a punch! Suck my long ropey arduous cock.

[anon]

My 'gay adoration' goes as far as gay-themed content.

Only reason I adored them in the first place was the roles that they played, and when they stop doing those things, I don't follow those people.

Not really fickle, is that?

[Nicole]

Hum. To me, it's all about how much they support the gay community. Who cares if they earned a few bucks playing an (sometimes outstanding)ongoing role or a a few million in a movie? That's their job. It's what they do off the screen that counts and those are the ones that I follow.

[Ralph]

Why (not really asking) would gay people want to fall for straight guys playing gay when we have our own hotties that "could" do the part just the same???

Let's have our own people play the actual parts. Really tired of the straights "pretending" to be gay, then shift gears and sometimes be against us.

[Benjamin David]

I guess I have to give up my "Gay Mickey Mouse Club Card", or I am not gay (just do not tell my husband). But this "gay idol worship", has NEVER been a part of my life. I only care if an actor does a good job in their acting. I could care less about Diva's or their male counterparts. I do not care "who I am wearing" (if they are comfortable and the colors go together, that is good enough). I find "gym bunnies" and "bar beefcake" to be narcissistic and shallow. A "pride parade" looks like the "effeminate nudist circus" to me. I am conservative, I am religious, I am "traditional" (monogamy and marriage mean something to me, be it a "legal marriage" or just some sort of "commitment ceremony"). As "campy" as I really go is perhaps "Death at a Funeral" more than Sean Hayes "Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss" was a SNORE to me (cracked up at "9 Dead Gay Guys", so I do have a sense of humor). I am one of the guys that at age 8, watching Star Trek reruns knew SULU WAS GAY, long before he came "out of the closet". So I just do not get the "camp factor", I guess. My "gay gene" must be "missing a few chromosomes". I do have an IQ high enough for MENSA, and I can appreciate BBC America more than Bravo or Fine Living Network (a hunk is David Tennant , but to me he is no "gay icon" as far as I know). But I do not "swoon" after any actor, character, or Diva (if I remember my Italian, Divo is the male form). I did not like "Will and Grace" (hate is too strong of a word for the show, but I HATED SEAN HAYES). But I do not miss an episode of "Criminal Minds" with Eric McCormack, not because he is "playing gay", but he is a more fleshed out character, and a great ensemble cast. Same with the Law and Order Series' and the CSI's. So it is more "content" than "gay icons" as far as television programs are concerned. Just my "food for thought".

[Kmix]

As an actor, I am intrigued by the public's facination with the private lives of performers.

I, for one, hold the creative aspect highest above all else, but then, I AM an actor,

The arguement of straight actors "playing gay" is one thorn in my side since little (if anything) is ever said (or written) of gay actors "playing straight". I, myself, have only once been given the opportunity to portray a gay character onstage, but that may have been because I can sing. I have been stuck in straight(and/or non-descript) character roles for a very long time; to the point that no one believes me when I tell them I'm gay. Oh, course that usually follows them trying to fix me up with their sister or daughter, but that's a completely different subject.

[*LadyBeatty*]

I will never forget and so much credit to Nathan Lane's performance in The BirdCage!

[Tommy]

Whats with this Celebrity crazed world? They are self centered egotists who thrive on attention.

Enough already....Im getting bored!

[Jude]

Interestingly Madonna only appears once in the commentary thus far. A celebrated pioneer of image, self-esteem, responsible freedom of sexual expression at the time AIDS emerged she brought subcultures including our own to the mainstream, raised millions for AIDS causes and rocked more stylez than the best drag queens.
Madonna is arguably a generation of gay men's soulmate.

[Jude]

Interestingly Madonna only appears once in the commentary thus far. A celebrated pioneer of image, self-esteem, responsible freedom of sexual expression at the time AIDS emerged she brought subcultures including our own to the mainstream, raised millions for AIDS causes and rocked more stylez than the best drag queens.
Madonna is arguably a generation of gay men's soulmate.

[Jamie]

To be very honest with you, I didn't care for Eric McCormack, Sean Hayes or Debra Messing. She didn't even make a good fag hagg! And from what I've seen of her new show, I could even care less about her. In some cases all three of them gave gays a bad name.

[Tom]

From my theatre seat, as long as they don't do something stupid (like speak out against us), I'm gonna cut them some slack; though I must say Tom Hank's silence on the recent gay marriage debate in California (given his Oscar speech for Philadelphia) mystifies me.

And by-the-way, who was the idiot who issued Sean Hayes a gay card? Karl Rove (yikes!) has more right to own one than he does!

[Wayne]

Um...sorry, but I don't think Tom Hanks & Antonio Banderas "won our hearts" in that mediocre film "Philadelphia" where they allegedly played lovers who never even touch each other for heaven's sake. One of the reasons "Making Love," "Brokeback Mountain" and "Latter Days" are much better films is they involved str8 actors not afraid to play tonsil hockey.

[dom]

I have to say that I think that Gale Harold can suffer the same fate as alot of the others on the list. I don't really think of him much and he is only playing straight now. In fact he is now on Desperate Housewives playing a wife's new love interest. I guess at least he's on a show with a following huh? Also, as for Debra Messing...if you haven't seen Starter Wife you should. She has a gay best friend again. I think those who say she is going to suffer that fate needs to think again.

[Josh Love]

I dont know about the rest of you gays out there, but for me Debra will alays be in my heart. So will the rest of the W&G cast. Debra is georgose, and a suporter. For that and other things she is forever memorable.

I also think they should have at least mentioned Cher.

[Michael]

I think Debra Messing is wonderful. She has continued to be surrounded by gay iconic types, recently in the movie the Women, with a diva filled cast, including Bette Midler among others. Just saw the premiere of the Starter Wife, and saw the miniseries and loved it! Her best friends are played by the very gay friendly Judy Davis (who portrayed Judy Garland in Me and My Shadows) and Chris Diamantopoulos, a cutie who happens to play her gay best friend. So in the end, Debra has chosen very gay friendly roles since leaving Will & Grace. I think she is one of the best!

[candybob]

At least Gay issues are on out TV screens and on the big screen.

Does it really matter so much if a person is gay, bi, straigh, pansexual? Labels can segregate people, and yet can also unify them.

Ideally at leats it should not only be the message a person says but also what they believe in off screen.

I agree with everything everyone said, becuase being a GAY Icon is more than what is said.

Some actors let their GAY Icon statue define who they are, and some dont. Some find coming to terms with being gay/bi/pansexual/ harder than others.

[Jason]

It seem's most comments are posted by people who take this a little too I don't normally post on these things, but felt compelled this time. This article is for "entertainment" and should be taken as such. It also could not begin no list all gay icons, so if someone isn't mention, RELAX.
I personally wasn't offended that Mika wasn't mentioned. lol
The funny thing is, I don't agree with Jake and Heath being gay icon's. That movie, albeit, historical for homosexuals, was rediculous. (I have to mention, being a gay man, you don't unzip and stick it in that easily, THERE IS WORK INVOLVED! But I can understand why people show them respect. I respect them for being such good actors that they can kiss another man, even though they aren't gay.
Karen, from Will & Grace, is every man's best friend! We should all have a Karen Walker in our life, it would be more fun.
Cyndi Lauper has definatly EARNED, and continues to earn, a gay following.
We should try and focus on a celeb who does thing for the gay community. Not just acting in gay roles, but actually doing something for the gay community. I think, to a certain degree, that can be done simply by acting, or in Cyndi's case, by actually DOING something for the gay community.
She loves the gay's, always will, and that's why she has a following.

[Donna S]

What a ridiculous article & comparison(s). First of all no, actors do not deserve thanks for getting paid to play a gay or gay-friendly role. And to compare them to Cyndi, who continues to fund raise for equality year after year? Even if they're not fund raising, actors can be making statements to support equality in many ways, since they get the publicity. That's how you win friends & influence people.

[amoasian]

Has everyone forgotten Terence Stamp and his fantastic role in "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert?"

[Gregoire]

Does anyone out there count Jane Olivor as a gay diva also? I've seen her in concert so many times...
and every crowd was so completely "gay"....I started getting phone #s during the intermissions!!!!!

[Marshall in Seattle]

Icon schmicon. But why is Gale Harold from Queer as Folk, and who is straight, an icon but others in the cast who are gay -- Randy Harrison and Peter Paige come to mind, and whom I'd have as friends or more long before Gale -- not icons. I mean, come on. Gay and acting gay takes at least as much fortitude as straight and acting gay.

[Marshall in Seattle]

Here's another vote for songbird Jane Oliver!!!

[dwight]

Why would you use Debra Messing as an example. "The Starter Wife" is as gay as gay can be? Pretty stupid example if you ask me.

[Jordan Cambridge]

I think Debra Messing is starting to come back. For those of you that don't know, in her newest show The Starter WIfe on USA, Messing (The leading character) has a gay best friend. So maybe in the near future she will be back on our gaydars.

[Sonalee]

No. She just needs a lawyer to file paper for her

[Savio]

Shawn...
I watch Ugly Betty already... its so much fun also. And I probably watch most of these programs even if they may not be gay. But in the gayest ones.... Will and Grace is the best.

[Aggie]

For the one who said that if people don't discuss their sexual orientation in public means that they're gay... I played lesbian roles, my parents know absolutely nothing about my sexual preferences (I never brought a date to their place) and I am straight...

Do you really think that a gay guy would accept a role that is such a cliché about the community he belongs to? Check Sean Hayes' interview on Jon Stewart. He said he was straight but since it was thrown in the middle of the conversation, it passed unnoticed. Check also his interview by Bryan Callen. This is Sean in his real life. People who think he's gay are always the on who haven't met him in real life. You'd be pretty surprised by him.